Why “I’ll Do It Later” Is More Complicated Than It Sounds
I say “I’ll do it later” with an impressive amount of confidence for someone who has apparently never met Later Jill. Later Jill is very busy. She has the things Current Jill didn’t feel like doing, the things Morning Jill didn’t have time to do, and at least three things Yesterday Jill confidently handed over […]
The Weird Amount of Energy It Takes to Keep Track of “Almost Done”
I currently have several things that are almost done. This sounds like good news. It is not. Almost done means the hard part is finished. The document is written. The form is filled out. The email is drafted. The appointment has been researched. The laundry has made it through both the washer and the dryer. […]
Sometimes You Don’t Know You’re Overwhelmed Until You Stop
Have you ever had one of those weeks where you’re doing fine? Busy, definitely. Maybe a little tired. But fine. You’re answering emails. Going to work. Making dinner. Remembering appointments. Having conversations. Handling whatever gets thrown at you. You’re functioning. And then Saturday morning comes. You don’t have anywhere you need to be. Nobody needs […]
Why Some Days the Same Task Feels Completely Different
There are days when I can sit down at my computer, knock out half my to-do list, answer emails, make appointments, run errands, figure out dinner, and somehow still have enough brainpower left to have an actual conversation at the end of the day. And then there are days when I stare at an email […]
Why We Sometimes Need to Say Things Out Loud to Think
Have you ever been trying to figure something out in your head for what feels like forever, only to finally say it out loud and immediately think: “Oh. There it is.” Suddenly, the thing that made absolutely no sense five seconds ago makes perfect sense. Or maybe you’re the person who sends a friend a […]
Executive Function Isn’t About Intelligence
One of the comments I heard most often while Gabe was growing up sounded like a compliment. “He’s so smart.” And he is. He’s curious. He notices details other people miss. He can have incredibly thoughtful conversations, especially about topics that interest him. When something clicks, it really clicks. But those same conversations often ended […]
Why Small Decisions Can Feel So Exhausting
Have you ever reached the end of the day and thought, “Why am I so tired?” Not physically tired. Brain tired. The kind of tired where someone asks you what’s for dinner, and suddenly that feels like the hardest question you’ve been asked all day. The weird part is that nothing particularly big happened. There […]
Your Brain Was Never Meant to Remember Everything
We’ve all heard it. “Just remember.” “Don’t forget.” “You need to be more organized.” “Maybe write it down.” (Which is always my favorite advice because…where did I write down where I wrote the thing down?) The funny thing is that we’ve somehow accepted this idea that the human brain should be able to remember hundreds […]
The Hidden Mental Load of ADHD
There’s a version of ADHD that people think they understand. “Oh look, a squirrel.”“Can’t sit still.”“Forgot their homework again.”“Probably just needs a planner.” Thank you, Brenda. Truly groundbreaking analysis. But the reality of ADHD is way less “quirky distraction” and way more “my brain has 37 browser tabs open, 12 are frozen, one is playing […]
Why One Task Feels Like 17 Steps
“It’s just one task.” It’s a phrase that gets used often, usually with good intentions. The goal is to simplify something that feels overwhelming. But for many neurodivergent individuals, that phrase doesn’t match the reality of how tasks are experienced. Because what looks like one task on the outside rarely feels that way on the […]
English